Currently, more and more of Grandma, Grandpa, Grandma, Sir, put into custody in the ranks of the grandchildren. Whether in the community in the courtyard, or in the kindergarten door of the former, you can see many elderly people in the custody or transfer of their grandchildren. In the class I taught has half of the children of elderly transfer.
Help for the elderly and children with children has three major advantages: first, has rich experience of life and parental experience for the elderly, especially loves to Sun generation, caring. Relatively ample time after retirement for the elderly, child care more patient, more touch, sense of responsibility more, love for children. Second, young parents are busy, the child care problem is their broken heart, there is a help for the elderly, can alleviate the worries of young parents, so that they more fully committed to work third, good for the elderly. Old people fear most lonely, their grandchildren around the feet of an elderly person, for the elderly is maximum comfort and happiness in life in his old age. At the same time can be obtained from the child\'s growth vitality, also belonging to, providing opportunities for active ageing. This family relationships with the grandchildren play games to help maintain a healthy state of mind benefit for the elderly.
Old man takes children although there is some merit, but because of the old values, lifestyle, education, and modern society will be more or less a difference. In addition, naturally with the elderly on the old man\'s physiological and psychological characteristics. Therefore, the old man with children there are also certain drawbacks.
, Excessive love lead to spoil.
The elderly are often especially loves children, and vulnerable to no principle of accommodation, and doting. And also the elderly mental some scruples would – if it goes wrong, fear of children blame. Director of the elderly in accordance with the child, unreasonable desire to kids no principle of a regular meeting. A long time, children will feel that they are the family of \"dominate\"--everyone was listening to one\'s own, slightly unhappy it will cry. Elderly fear children cry bad body and various coax. In this way, children will find by crying, temper will achieve your goal, so children will be threatened by lost his temper and bitter parents, to meet their own non-requirements. Therefore, excessive indulgence and compromise easy for children \"egocentric\" consciousness, form a selfish, willful and other undesirable personality.
Qi Qi of the children in my class, like a sheep in the kindergarten, and has never had children, what things are not done, sleeping is not find bed, get up and do not wear clothes, lace sth, for his performance in the Park, we conduct home visits, the original Qi Qi at home, my grandmother used to do everything for him. Get up, to help him wearing clothes, lace. A meal, give him a piece of feeding of sth, self-care ability is poor. However, Super temper, unhappy wept a little nasty, throwing toy book, grandma was coaxed and advise. According to Grandma said, when I eat the same way, who do what they wish to eat won\'t allow a taste, their favorite toys or other children play, said the elderly really took him no way.
Mr Chen heqin\'s once said, \"what children can do it, let him go by himself\" so as to fostering children\'s ability of independence, and responsibility. Someone doing research on one or two grade of primary school students, nursery, kindergarten children and youzu children of parents, making mental comparisons found them very different. Groups of primary school students from kindergarten up strong sense, adaptability, social circle, many hands to do many things, guts, and able to endure hardship, as General wrestling and scratches like nothing. Very little will be able to cross the road. Not brought up children and the elderly, school also transfers to the elderly, do not want to do, like bags, don\'t want to do. Encounter problems, slightly unhappy, crying, the spoiled, lack of ability, not gregarious. Just like Lu Xun by the Shanghai children\'s book: \"term of domineering, regardless, swearing, beating AP course, is in front of the door or storm Lord, is a fighter, but outside, half will lose the network spider, without immediately\". Therefore, the ancestors of the mollycoddle, delaying the development of children independent of consciousness and independent behavior.
Second, the ancestors of education is not suitable for the development of the times
Rapid development in society today, the ancestors of some of the ideas and concepts are relatively old, and realistic standards there is a gap, is not easy to accept new things, often fail to keep pace with social development and the concept soon.
When the children were caught up in \"breaking\" a toy car on ten ancestors will be approached to stop or criticism. In their view, a good toy car can not be \"breaking\", and this behavior as is a child\'s bad behavior. In fact, this is the children explore the innovation performance of transaction characteristics.
Some ancestors of people affected by the generally low level of education, knowledge is narrow, accepted and education for decades, but have ancestors who brought children, it is easy to feel that they are \"hands\", \"eat more salt than younger adults to eat rice.\" Therefore, tend to replace science with experience.
Once overheard this one thing: a very pretty girl, but he was full of black spots on teeth. Girl mothers complain of her mother with her child became such. It turns out that when sleeping every night, Grandma give children to drink sugar water, more children drink more love to drink, in the long run, is covered with black spots on teeth. And the child\'s grandmother said, \"don\'t trust a book saying, child deciduous teeth because it is off, long do net net new is not the same as white? Furthermore, I hours without eating some sweets, the teeth do not fall out? \"Who do not know, have a direct impact on the development of permanent teeth in deciduous teeth.
Third, easily lead to parent-child relationship between alienated
Loving grandchildren for the elderly and parents love their children, have similarities, there are differences. Are all out of love for the children of the same Department. Different is that different forms of love, parents love their children to \"strict\", the old man loves his grandson are somewhat \"Tsu\" \"width\" and \"capacity\". Even my parents \' discipline, ancestors are unwarrantable shield and stand. Ancestors of intervention, to prevent parents from exercising their right to education of children, which is bound to lead to contradictions between the elderly and parents, so as to stand off.
In young children, in their view, who did not hit his scolding him, who according to him, it is good to him. But parents demanded of him, unreasonable demands not be met. They would take it that the parents for him is not good, does not love him, to parental conflict, and lead to children and parent child relationships between estranged.
Master\'s master of the children in my class, his willful, so Grandma every day to pick up, otherwise it will not go away. On one occasion, Grandma is ill, mother to pick her up, said nothing. Finally, are let grandmother came from. Master master\'s mother said, \"are so used to his grandmother, regret was he by his grandmother. ”
One of my colleagues are also followed the grandmother since childhood. Now she\'s talking to is that Grandma good, have any word you say to Grandma. She knows her parents is also very good, but she always felt and parents emotionally a little gap.
Four, grandparents often enclosed in a small environment grandchildren
Childhood is precisely the children strong intellectual curiosity, critical period of plenty of physical and mental activity, which require intellectual stimulation and activities that give them reasonable force. If enclosed in a small environment where children, children often develop within, not athletic habits and lifestyle.
Physiological decline in the elderly, a cripple, static and lazy, total circles in a circle, child, children easily old enough lively enough. Impeded the development of child intelligence.
Minmin is an example of my neighbor, MOM and dad go to work no time to take care of the child, had to let her grandparents. Grandpa is a secondary school teacher, teaching children mathematics, computational problem, literacy at home every day. Grandfather is proud to say: \"sensitive-sensitive a grade also must be a\" top \". But less attention to children\'s development, and exchanges with the children, and so on. Until the child enters kindergarten, problems arose, children can\'t up the stairs, not slide, not running, not with children sth, which has plagued minmin parents.
In short, old man with children has its pros and cons, handled properly, will do more harm than good. Therefore, the old man takes children on this matter, must grasp well its role, clearly they are supporting, the protagonist is the child\'s parents. Can\'t we exaggerate, belly-worship. Meanwhile, the elderly should strengthen their own learning, with the times, renewal of raising offspring of concept, education children with scientific knowledge.
For a common aspiration, and that is educate children. Old people should play to their strengths, overcome their disadvantages, let the children grow up better.
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