Spoiling children grow

The Chinese inscription: children on the road to growth, there is a very gentle trap, who personally mining too parents of children of asylum, child fell into the trap, because they were deprived of opportunities to make mistakes and correct the error, thus also losing the power to grow up.

Case

A key middle school high school girl Ko so-young, high school on the first month, her father ran to school every day, almost impossible to work. It turns out that small before the English high school, MOM and dad to her love and, when the mother looked after her daily living comfort; father of but also not daughter by any aggrieved, as long as the Sub-spoiled daughter, father must \"surrender\". Is a girl, to the school after boarding, he found himself will not dry, proud of her and unwilling to consult students and therefore run into snags everywhere. Even worse is that much-loved at home, parents everywhere modest little English, was not welcomed by the students, she cannot communicate with the students of the effeminate: a full, particularly with the hostel students deal with relationships. Thus, students easily saying \"Oh, no, you can\'t wash lunch boxes didn\'t know? \"Teachers have no intention of saying\" things could not clean up clean up \", in the words of small sounds are mocked Lee. She ran several times a day to a telephone booth, each time you pick up the phone and heard the voice of the father as they burst into tears. Telephone there father heard the cry of the baby daughter of heart, putting down the telephone, drove to the school. All in a day\'s work, the family exhausted. Until the school\'s psychological teachers know about ex post facto, pointed out that Xiao Li this dependency is in fact by the parents, especially when father condoned the results, her parents before suddenly waking up.

Analysis

Overprotective causing today\'s adolescent physiological, psychological functioning degradation, some parents in school trying to their children on the one hand \"pressurized\", and in their daily life as much as possible for them to create a very good condition, this led the kids brains now \"developed\", and limb weakness. In a comfortable environment, some function of the youth in the human body is gradually degraded. Because their life needs are easily met, almost no overcoming difficulties, this can be done, there will be no development. Young people growing up for opportunities to develop their own capacity and thus be deprived.

Today\'s family would be useful in the following example.

Hui Shi and Chuang are good friends of Wei. Day of Wei sent two of his big gourd seeds respectively, they said, \"you to take the seeds to plant in the ground, will bear a great deal of hyacinth. Look, you who both kind of gourd, and at that time I have a reward. ”

Hui Shi and Chuang are pleased to have received, and to plant in the ground.

In order to be kind than of Zhuang Zi\'s greater gourd, Hui Shi very carefully, and fertilization, weed every day. Place of the gourd kind of Zhuangzi in the near, but he never fertilization, weed control, just to see, is no exception, since Koo went to something else.

Soon, Hui Shi gourd seedling tree of a tree to die off, finally, is a survival of a no. Zhuangzi\'s gourd seedling grow exceptionally well, slowly, flowering and fruit, and, as of Wei put it, long gourd is very big.

Hui Shi thought it strange, ran to consult Zhuangzi: \"Sir, why am I so carefully cultivated, all of the seedlings have died, and you will never make management, but looks so good? ”

Zhuangzi answered with a smile: \"you are wrong, in fact, I am also in the heart of management, but with your methods. ”

\"What about what method do you use? ”

\"Law of nature! You didn\'t see me the time to go to the fields around it! I am to see the gourd seedling in field is not happy, if they are all very happy, I certainly will not have to them. And you\'re regardless of their feelings, as hard as fertilizer, which does not die? ”

\"In that case, I let them also? ”

\"Is it is! Your intentions are good, but you don\'t have to natural law, what might get the support of the natural world? ”

It dawned on Hui Shi.

Allow children to make their own choices

Many parents are \"for the child mind\", and many parents pay more attention to children in foreign countries made their choice.

In the United States born little Tony grew up fascinated by car, parents to let him keep this hobby, always try to meet the needs of his collection, often to buy him back to a wide variety of toy cars, they think this hobby is very favorable to his growing, therefore strongly support him, and to share this happiness with and children. One day, Tony go shopping with my mother, mother to buy him a new blue \"car\". With car excitedly Tony and MOM walking home, no sooner had the door, neighbors Bob and Mi Li about his children to play, mother told he never lost the car. When the children happily returned home, hand car was gone, turned into a small cartoon pictures. Mother very angry, really wanted to immediately called to the children, but she forced her biting back and calmly to the children about the car\'s whereabouts. It turns out that Tony children see a play has a picture of the same cartoon pictures, hearts also want one, he lived another child of persuasion, car and somebody in the hands of a card, home, a and he is for his other children the same card and happy. Mother blamed the child, but quietly said: \"this small card is so exquisite! ”

A few days later, when Tony to his beloved car formed when rows to admire, MOM aside and said: \"If the blue car also came in with them, nice! \"Until then, his mother to the son shows cartoon pictures and the value of the car, should the vehicle for card issue and by the children themselves to thinking. Here, mother while very distressed children lose the car, but she respects the child\'s choice. She did not go to scold the child, to avoid children embarrassed, nor forced child automobile back, when children understand the value of the car and card and two things for themselves, what is more important, maybe he will be back to automobile, maybe he won\'t do such \"silly things\".

Rich has to \"poor\" children

Australia is a developed country, peoples lives richer. However, rich Australia people believe in: the rich have to \"poor\" children! Their reasons are, lack of self-control and spoil the child\'s ability to live independently, then inevitably suffer heavy losses. \"Children should be less than the adults wore a dress\", this is Australia neighbors see me like a child package when cotton said. True, is the coldest month, rarely seen which Australia human child to wear the coat and exposure suit, only up to \"short dress\"---and a sweat shirt outside, there is no general road in the cold wind. And one to the Sun is out, will sweat shirt off, only wearing short clothes, shorts, short skirts. Near our apartments have a gymnastics school, daily evening at the end of training, common parents accompany bald, bare feet, wearing sleeveless shorts-only child out of the school, despite The chill entered into the very flesh of the men., but very few parents fuss, carry shoes, strength, put on clothes for their children. Australia is not very cold in winter, but sooner or later larger temperature difference, temperatures often below 10 degrees Celsius, with our Asian perspective, children \"short dress\" is wearing too little.

Have a gynaecology and obstetrics hospital in Sydney saw this scene: a couple second child Checkup, his wife has gone into the room to see a doctor, the husband would take two years daughter wait outside in the Hall. After a short while, daughter said with to drink, so father will in side of automatically vending machine Shang smoothly pulled has a free paper Cup, into toilet received has a cup tap water will delivery to children hand in (tap water in Australia can drinking)--that father not buy does not to beverage, automatically vending machine is sold a Yuan a cup of Coca-Cola and orange juice; and he also not buy does not up beverage, he is a sports supplies company of competent, annual salary 150,000 dollars.

Actually, the \"poor\" to-children is not individual. Every day of child inoculation injection, formed long queues in community child health station. In the queue, common parent would also not walking children and throw to the ground (to spread a carpet), its to climb, junior, to roll over, children crying, is just a consolation two, absolutely do not see the cry of the phenomenon. Australia who have a passion for sports of the brave surfing, whether it is summer or winter, parents used to take their children to the beach. Children fade \"bound\", playing in bare feet to play sand, water; slightly larger children follow parents surf in the sea, frequent phenomenon of the choke with water, but most parents just patted back for it, would encourage children to fight in the sea again surfing. On a day to the beach, saw a child from a distance when surfing maneuver planted gendou, I cannot help but shout: \"saving. \"Being near the children\'s father took:\" shallow water there, flooding is not dead. \"In fact Australia man\" rich has to \' poor \' children \"is not as deliberately as the Japanese. In their words, but is \"for the sake of the future\"---the children grown up sooner or later leave his father to go into the world, rather bewildered helpless they face setbacks, might as well let them fall put up with setbacks since childhood, and \"poor\" a life in the face of the courage and ability to sth This is not a new concept, I couldn\'t help but into deep thought: and has entered the rich Club of Australia than we care to children is a bit too much?